October 25, 2016; exactly 29 months ago is when I first announced:
I'M DOING IT
After almost 2 and a half years of planning, I finally saw this dream come true. What a dream it was, and what an unbelievable day it was!
In life, we sometimes (lots of times, actually) have expectations. We have thoughts on what will make us happy ... our marriages, a job, kids, vacation, etc. When these expectations fall short, they leave us feeling sad and disappointed and searching for another way to find happiness or whatever we were searching for. This was not one of those times. This was a time for me that far surpassed anything I had thought or dreamed of. The only way I can think of to totally and accurately describe this weekend is as follows:
Imagine someone gave you a box of chocolates. You open it up expecting gourmet truffles and instead find each space is full of diamonds! That is what I got this weekend ... diamonds instead of chocolate.
I learned so much over the last 2 1/2 years working on this. I learned what a fantastic and loving friend Yossi had in Yonatan. I learned what a phenomenal young man he has grown into, someone who is so much wiser than his years. I have deep admiration and respect for him. And for his parents for way they parented him. I learned to let go when it is important to let go, and that Hashem hears our prayers and truly does count our tears. Hashem also holds our hands and guides us along the way, never leaving our side, not even for one second.
In so many ways, this campaign was like a very long pregnancy. There were many ups and downs, issues and problems, and then solutions. The end result is a baby that makes all the suffering easily forgotten.
The last few weeks were truly insane in my house. I spent hours and hours working on this, from the time I woke up until I went to bed. I truly had a vision of how the day should be and while I had so much help, a bulk of it did fall on me because I was micromanaging and being a perfectionist. I spent the last night working until about 5:30am, and set my clock for 7am. Being a total procrastinator, I waited until that evening to finish my speech. At 5:30, I gave up and said it'll have to do.
It was so exciting once my friends started to arrive, making the day seem more real. I arrived at Keneseth Beth Israel (KBI) and immediately began to rearrange the room. I was rushing around and trying to get it set up the way I wanted when I realized it was so close to the time it was due to start and I still hadn't gotten dressed or put on my make up. Thankfully, I finished just as the guests started to arrive. How amazing to walk into the hall and see it filling up with people, and with the Torah spread out on the table waiting for final letters to be completed.
I'm going to have to let the pictures do the talking, since I seem to be at a lack for words. The only other way I can find to describe the procession is floating ... I imagine this is what the Yidden felt like in the midbar on the anani hakavod ... the Clouds of Glory that lead their way.
So many beautiful things came out of this shabbos. To sum up what someone told me the night before the Hachnasas Sefer Torah ... You can't control what happened to Yossi, but you can control what you do with it. And I feel like I did .... I took a very dark and depressing episode of my life and turned it into one of the brightest parts of my life. I feel so uplifted from this special weekend / shabbos. As long as Yidden love the Torah which such a fierceness, there is no outside force that can ever bring us down.
2 comments:
Such a Blessing. So Proud of you. Thank you again for all you do.
So thrilled to have been able to help one aleph's worth in this magnificent & glorious honor to Yossi, and blessing for the Community as a whole! Esther
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