Sad, sad state we are in

I got my new issue of the N'shei Chabad Newsletter.  There is a section there called "Open House" where you write about anything you want.  So some guy writes in about how he was a concerned parent when he dropped his kid off at camp.  Some other guy who was leaving the shul patted some little kid on the head.  The guy complained to the director that no one should be walking through the camp.  (He's right about that.)  On his way out, he passed the guy who patted the kid on the head.  He said to this guy, I know you meant well, but never touch a kid who isn't yours.

THIS IS A PROBLEM!  How sad!  When I first started teaching back in the 80s, there was no problem with touch a kid.  I vividly remember hugging kids who struggled and then got it right.  I patted kids on the head for reading nicely.  Hey, I'm a touchy-feely kind of gal, so it was just part of who I am.  Over the years, that slowly stopped.  I took a hiatus for a few years.  When I went back, the rules had changed.  No, you can't touch a kid.  At all. Imagine now how helpless, useless, and totally stupid I felt when one of my kids, a third grader I think, got a nose bleed. All I could do was hand him a tissue and say, pinch your nose real hard.  Yeah, it was doozer.  I'd been through them with Yossi (a'h), and I knew exactly what to do, how hard to pinch, how to tilt his head, but all I could do was tell him what to do and get the principal in to call his mom.  WHAT A STUPID WASTE!  The kid was probably scared, but I didn't want to take a chance.

Same reason why my father in law wouldn't give my kids baths.  What kind of world have we created?  A world where people can hold a gay parade and run around naked, but a woman breast feeding her baby is disgusting.  A woman who won't issue gay marriage certificates is thrown in jail, and yet I have not heard a single word from anyone here (besides conservatives) about gays being thrown off buildings.  Women here are up in arms because some of us find it disgusting to kill babies and sell their body parts, but have nothing to say about the rape of women and young girls, nor about the genital mutation that goes on as well.  Not one peep. Complete crickets.  WestBoro Baptist Church wants to picket the funerals of military men who lost their lives serving our country screaming G-d hates Fags, and that is OK.  But G-d forbid a person should refer to Bruce Jenner as a man.  The saddest part?  These so called progressives so no hypocrisy here.  Nope.  Not one bit.

Ker a velt.  We need to try and turn the world right-side up, because right now it is so upside down.  I really gotta stop listening to the news, because it is just so crazy.  My head feels like exploding so many times from the sheer lunacy that is considered completely normal.  Anyway.  That's it. Rant over for this second.

Whose money is it really?

Teshuva, Tefilla, and Tzedakah ...

We hear that over and over again during this Tishrei holiday season.  We should return to Hashem, connect to Him via prayer, and give a lot of tzedakah.
What exactly is tzedakah.  People translate it as "charity".  Except, that does not serve as an accurate translation. The real translation is "justice".  Hashem has set this world up in such as a way as there are the haves and the have nots.  There are people who have a lot of money, and there are people, lo alainu (it shouldn't happen to us), that don't have.  So why in the world would G-d do that?  Doesn't it make more sense for Him to just make every one equal? We could all have a set amount of money, food, clothes, and lalala, the world would be awesome, right?  But no. That is not the way Hashem has set it up for a lot of reasons. First of all, by making people unequal in wealth, He has set us up with the ability to think of others. We can become G-dly by performing these acts of kindness.  When a person toils over their living, and then they bring it home, there is a certain satisfaction that comes from their hard work.  Then along comes G-d and He says, take some of that money that you sweated and worked hours for, and give it away.  That's right!  Just give it away.  (No, I'm not talking about donating it to yourself, or give it to people who choose to just sit around doing nothing.) There are plenty of people who for whatever reason just don't have. Either they are ill, or have an ill family member, or just don't have mazel in finding a job. Whatever.  They just don't have the money we have.  By taking our hard earned money, and giving it to someone who has less than we have, we are creating justice through our act of kindness. We are showing Hashem is the true source of our income.  (Truthfully, that is what Rosh Hashanah is all about!  Declaring Hashem our King, and that every single thing we have, good health, money, clothes, house, kids, it ALL comes from Him.)  
Tanya teaches us this over and over again.  Sometimes we hear a person say, times are really tight right now; I can't give. That is the wrong attitude. That is EXACTLY the time we are SUPPOSED to give.  After all, if you believe that Hashem runs the world, and Hashem gives us parnasa, then you need to believe that Hashem will give you the money to give to tzedakah.

I've seen this happen so many times.  Like the time I pledged $480 to tzedakah.  That pledge was made at a time when I didn't have a job and I had no income.  No way to earn that money.  Not a single way.  Then I hit upon an idea ... a friend had taught me about selling jewelry.  It was my FIRST time doing it.  I made two sales, and I said, the money I earn from these sales will go to the my pledge.  I made the money with a dollar extra!  Which leads me to this week.

Last week I kept reminding myself ... I have to donate to Colel Chabad.  Colel Chabad Rosh Hashanah campaign They are an incredible organization in Israel that provides for the poor families there.  It is one of my favorite organizations to give to.  When you click on the link, you will see what I saw ... $180 feeds a needy family with small children for the entire month of Tishrei.  Whoa! That shocked me incredibly!  I was at first debating between $54 & $72.  When I saw that, I thought to myself, Hey, I spend more than that a WEEK on food for my family.  How can I not give more?  And besides, Hashem will pay for it.  With a very clear conscience, I clicked on the $180 tab.  I knew with all my heart, Hashem will cover the bill.  (You also have to understand that right now I have run my credit cards up with my jewelry purchases.  Which is why I hesitated for half a second.)  I also thought it would help me on Rosh Hashanah when I stand in front of Hashem, so I did have an ulterior motive!  Now, I sorta forgot about it, until tonight, when I turned my phone on after yom tiff.  I hear kachings (the sound my eBay app makes when I make a sale), and was like, OH, what did I sell?  [FYI-- I asked my rav if I am allowed to leave my ebay auctions up on holidays and shabbos.  This is NOT a pasak ... you have to ask your own rav.]  Even more surprising is the fact I sold anything, since I set my store to "vacation mode".  Meaning, it shows that I am not around and not shipping until tomorrow.  So now, what did I sell ... I sold a gold bracelet that has been sitting up there since last July, and a really ugly silver silver necklace (in my not so humble opinion, but hey, I just sell them; I don't wear them!).  The grand total after eBay fees, PayPal fees, and shipping ... $367!  Yup.  You read that right.  Not only did Hashem pay for my donation, but he gave it to me double!

So my advice to anyone who reads this is this --- DONATE, DONATE, DONATE!  Never hesitate to stretch out your hand or tax your credit card bill.  I'm not saying to go nuts, and donate a million dollars.  Just donate what you really think you can, and Hashem will handle it for you.  I'll blog another time about the idea of "chomesh", giving 20% rather than the mandatory 10%, because it really is true.  Hashem WILL give you back your money and more.

Wishing everyone a gmar chasima tova.  May we all be inscribed for a good and sweet year with Moshiach!!!

(One last note -- I am loathe to share my mitzvos.  I hate when people list that so and so did this or that.  The only reason I am sharing this story is to encourage as many people as possible to give donations with a very open and free hand.  Especially during this Tishrei season when there are so many expenses.)

The Gift of Teshuva

The Jewish month of Elul is an amazing time to me.  Teshuva is often translated as repentance.  That doesn't do the word justice.  Teshuva means, To Return.  To return to what?  Hashem has set up a path for us to follow.  He's given us the Torah (and the other nations have the Seven Noahide Laws), and it has all our laws.  It has our moralities.  It literally has an answer for anything that may come up in life, if you know where to look.  In order for us not to be robots, G-d has given us a challenge.  He's given us this guy whose sole job is to make us mess up.  The yatzer hora, or evil inclination, is so tricky and conniving!  He isn't going to tell ME to use my phone on Shabbos when no one is around.  Oh no.  He knows where my weakness are, and that is where he digs in.  When I give in to these temptations, I have veered off the path G-d wants me on.  Teshuva means to return to that path.
IT'S AN AMAZING THING!!!! For me personally, I have people who have hurt me in some way.  I have a friend who did something very thoughtless years ago.  I cut off contact with this person, because I can't see past what happened. Every time I think of her, I think of what happened.  It has colored the way I view her, and not in a flattering way.  There are people who we get into fights with, or we just don't connect with.  It's very hard to view the person totally objectively.  (I am speaking ONLY to myself here.)  Hashem is different.  When I am sorry, and I truly with all my heart regret a mistake I have made, Hashem completely forgives me.  Not only is not like it never happened.  Oh NO!  Hashem takes it one step further.  When I make a mistake, and regret it, and use it as a learning experience on how to come closer to G-d, He actually turns that mistake into a merit!  Imagine that!  An avaira (sin) becomes a mitzvah!!!  THAT BLOWS MY MIND!  How kind is Hashem to give us this wonderful.  Not only does He forgive us, He does it lovingly, with a very open heart.  We can use the power of teshuva to actually travel through time, and take a mistake and make it a merit!
The point of the whole post today is two fold.  First, to bring to light how huge this is.  In my book, this is one of the most incredible gifts Hashem has given us.  Second, we need to try and emulate G-d.  I know for me this is hard.  But one of the things I would like to try to do is work on being more forgiving and seeing past those long gone issues.  I'm trying to view each person as a new person.  Not the one who hurt me.  Oiy.  Now the big question is ... do I write to that person and try to re-establish a relationship? Or do I just move on?  What would you do?  Does being a forgiving mean reopening your heart with the chance it may get broken again?  Is that a lack of trust?  Does that show I haven't moved on yet?  Oiy.  Elul is such a deep and introspective time.  We are running out of days.  Use your last few days wisely!

Why I carry a gun ...

I wrote this article in 2009.  It was printed in the N'shei Newsletter.

Being a child born to parents of the '60s, I grew up in an anti-war, anti-gun environment. Guns were evil. My mom used to tell me, “Guns kill people”. My brother never played cops & robbers, or cowboys & indians for one simple reason – there were no guns in our house. Not even a toy gun. So I guess it was no surprise when I had my kids that guns were absent from their many toys. Imagine my horror then when on his first day of preschool my 2 year old Yossi (a'h) came home and immediately showed me what he had learned. He took three Duplos and stuck them together, two smaller ones in a stack on the bottom of one longer one and voila! He had a toy gun. Over the years, there were various requests. “Can I have a water gun?” “What about a cap gun?” Always the same answer, “No, not in my house.” When Yossi got sick though, I did give in and allow my in-laws to buy him some. (He was living in their house; so technically, it wasn't in my house. I was never comfortable with the idea that he was playing with guns.

Fast forward to this past presidential election. One night I was looking through how each candidate felt about each issue. The question of gun control came up.

“Q: Is the D.C. law prohibiting ownership of handguns consistent with an individual’s right to bear arms?” ¹ Whoa, wait a second! There is a law in Washington, DC, preventing the ownership of a handgun? I was intrigued to find out that there are several places where owning a handgun is illegal, and one of the then candidates felt that this was within the realms of the US Constitution. That didn't seem right me. I starting looking some more, and was even more surprised to find the reasoning behind these laws ... if you prevent homeowners from having guns, you will prevent the criminals from getting them in the first place. (I think their faulty reasoning is that robbers breaking into houses and steal the legal hand guns.) This started me on an quest for information that I never ever imagined I would go on. I started looking into what exactly is our second amendment. What I found shocked me and turned my world upside down. The cities with the strictest gun control laws have the highest crime rates. Think of which cities have bans on owning a handgun – NY city; Chicago; Washington DC. They also have the highest crime rates in the whole country. It seems to me that if someone has no regard for the laws of not robbing, not raping, and not murdering, they are certainly not going to follow the law of not owning a handgun. In fact, the citizens who legally own their guns tend to be the most law abiding citizens, scrupulously following the laws set upon them. With this in mind, I set out to my local shooting range. A friend offered me a practical piece of advice – start small. So I arrived at the range, and for the first time in my life, I stood there trying to decide which gun I wanted to use. I picked a semi-automatic .22. They were extremely helpful, showing me how to load the gun, how to aim, and gave me some pointers. With a cheerful wave and a smile, and a nice “Have Fun!” I headed off to the range. My whole body shook as I loaded 10 bullets into the gun. Even though it was January, I wasn't shivering from the cold. I shook with fear, knowing I head a lethal weapon in my hand. I gave up after 15 rounds, although I was quite proud of myself for actually doing it. (I joked around that my hands were no longer innocent.) I did return the next week, and the next week and even the next one after that. I worked my way up from that little .22 to a 9 mm and then finally settled on a Smith and Wesson .357. I was hooked! I wanted a gun for personal protection. I liked the look and feel, and was able to control it very nicely. Next in my quest was to actually buy it. It seems that the one I picked was back ordered every where. I finally found it from an online auction site. Before anyone thinks that just anyone can buy a gun online, let me point this out ... the gun can only ship to an authorized dealer who runs all the usual background checks. (The gun I ultimately got is a revolver, not a semi-automatic like I had originally started out with.)

My in-laws think it is so funny how I have done such a total 180 on this issue. I have gone being totally against to being pro-gun ownership. I did take my kids to the shooting range. One daughter wanted nothing to do with it. My boys loved it. Our range offers a private safety class for children. It teaches them basic gun safety, and actually takes them onto the range where they get to use both a semi-automatic and a revolver. My gun sits in a special gun safe fully loaded with extra ammo. I sleep a little better knowing I have protection. I also took an extensive 9 hour class on gun safety. After passing this class, I was able to apply for my Concealed Handgun Permit. I am in the process of trying to decide what gun I want to carry on my person. It is a hard decision, because I want to make sure it is small and light, but big enough to have good stopping power. Recently, I was asked, “Why do you feel you need to have a gun?” I don't live in a high crime area. However, a short while ago, there was an incident a few homes away in which a young lady was kidnapped at gun point. The economy is taking a turn for the worse, and unfortunately, it is known that at times like these crime rates tend to go up. I want to know that if chas v'shalom something happens, my family will be protected. Last week, at a local convenience store, a guy walked in and shot the owner two times. He then tried to round up the other patrons, but met with an unexpected surprise. One of them was armed, and his quick action saved many lives. Surveillance footage shows that several times this robber aimed his gun at innocent people. It was an armed citizen who saved the lives of these other shoppers.

Sadly, the places that need armed protection the most are sorely lacking. I teach at our local Chabad Hebrew School. The front door is open to allow the kids to come in and parents to go out. After what happened in Mumbai, I am scared. I want to make sure nothing like that happens chas v'shalom in our Chabad House. However, state law prohibits me from bringing my loaded gun into the class (even if it is strapped to me in a holster or in my pocket book). What good would my gun be locked in my car? April 2, 2009, Nicole & Ben Goeser were eating in a restaurant in Nashville, TN. Although Nicole had a concealed weapons permit, she had to leave her gun locked in her car during dinner. The law on the books at that time prohibited CHP holders from carrying in a restaurant that serves liquor. Ben was gunned down right before Nicole's eyes, while she sat there; helpless to do anything. (Nicole was instrumental in changing this law, but it won't bring back her husband.) Time and time again, if you search carefully, you can find stories that get buried in the news. The truth about guns is this – GUNS SAVE LIVES. Criminals think twice about entering a home if they know there is a chance that they will be looking down the barrel of a gun. Think of all the people the brave guard of the National Holocaust Museum saved by shooting the crazed lunatic. It is too horrifying to think what might have happened had those guards been sitting there with nothing more than a “Please don't shoot us” that day. It is the cities that have taken the guns away from home owners and left them sitting ducks. According to the book, The Bias Against Guns by John R. Lott Jr., the homicide bombers in Eretz Yisroel originally tried shooting people in a busy Yerushalayim area. After their first attempt, they gave up. Too many Israeli citizens are armed. It was that realization that led them to start strapping bombs to themselves. There is a bumper sticker among gun advocates: When seconds count, the police are only minutes away. Interestingly enough, Jews are usually the ones who are the pacifists. It was the Jews in Germany who urged others to give up their guns when the Nazis (yamach shmo) started to un-arm citizens. It is not something that is usually talked about, but given the situation in the world, I don't think it would hurt for all of us to become familiar with how to work a gun, and into owning one. I do realize that if Rivky & Gavi (HY”D) had had guns it wouldn't have helped them. (The pictures I saw of the terrorists were horrifying. They had bullet proof vests and automatic weapons and a lot of clips with extra ammunition.) I do feel against a single gunman though, a homeowner or a Chabad House or a school should be able to fight back.

And my kids now? Do I let them play with guns? No. Because guns are not toys. I don't like the idea of them running around and pretending to shoot someone. I want them to respect and appreciate the gun for what it is, a valuable tool used for the preservation of human life.

1http://www.ontheissues.org/2008/Barack_Obama_Gun_Control.htm

Global cooling, I mean warming, I mean climate change

ARGH!  I can't take this anymore!!  I am so sick and tired of hearing all these liberals crying that we are destroying the Earth.  They are the world's biggest hypocrites about this whole issue.

Take for instance, all these "important people" who tell us we have to make changes.  Obummer, Pelosi, Al Gore, they all live like kings and do whatever they want. They trot all over the world, leaving behind "huge carbon emissions".  Obama pumps up the heat the White House in the winter, and I'm sure it's very cool in the summer.  When a person believes something, truly believes it, they follow it.  I believe pesticides and GMOs are dangerous to my body.  I don't eat them.  I don't feed them to my family.  I don't even feed them to my friends!  I wouldn't give them to animals.  I view them as poison.  If all these alarmist believed what they were preaching, they would lead by example. Instead, they tell US what we have to do, while they are too important to do it!  

If this was a real thing, they would not be behaving the way they do.  (case in point-- the polar ice caps are not melting; science has proven it.  google it.  Tell a lie often enough, people will start to believe it.)

See, when I was a kid in the '70s, I remember hearing the next ice age was coming. We were warned not to use aerosols.  No hair spray or spray deodorant if we wanted to prevent the next ice age.  Oops, then it turned out in the late 80s-early 90s that the earth was warming.  So now it was called Global Warming.  The polar ice caps were supposed to be gone by 2011.  When that year came and went, they pushed it back to 2035.  Too bad for them that the 2000s brought a decade with lower temperatures than the 80s-90s.  Basically ,the Earth cycles.  It makes sense to me. Everything in life cycles, if you think about it.  Warmer, cooler, warmer cooler.  If someone wants to pay higher electric bills, by all means, go ahead.  Don't tell me I have to.  BTW, I don't recycle, because that is another hoax.  All those lovely coke bottles that you lovingly drop into the recycle bin are shipped to China on a huge freight ship so that cheap labor can separate the 3 forms of plastic.  (the bottle, ring, and label are all different types; they can not be ground up together.)  These workers get paid bubkas!  Then, some company makes them into something else, which is again shipped back to the US on a huge freight ship, leaving a ginormous carbon foot print behind. 

If they really believed this, they wouldn't do it.